Dear Boys,
I'm sorry for the many times I pulled your ear when you weren't listening...or appeared not to be listening but were just tuning me out.
I'm sorry for yelling at you and calling you spoiled little brats.
I'm sorry for spanking you, throwing my chancla at you, or reaching behind the my seat while driving to pinch you.
I'm sorry for getting down on my knee to look you in the eye and whisper a torturing "promise" of whipping your butt if you didn't straighten out. I think I was more scared of you calling my bluff than you were of me following through.
I'm sorry for the endless time-outs. For taking away your TV privileges, your Wii, and you're BB guns that Tata shouldn't have bought you to begin with.
I'm sorry for making you write out sentence after sentence of "I will behave, I will make better choices" in your room til you were so tired you fell asleep.
I'm sorry for making you eat lettuce and tomatoes and giving you water instead of a second cup of juice.
I'm sorry for leaving you at Nana's while I took your brothers to Chuck E. Cheese to teach you a lesson on getting bad cards at school.
I'm sorry for making you scoop up dog poop and washing dishes and making you clean your own urine off the toilet seat.
For all those "mean" things I did, for which one day you'll resent me for if you haven't already, I'm truly sorry.
But one day, when you become a father...or an uncle, or a teacher, or a cop, or simply an adult, you'll look back and thank me. Because you'll know then that disciplining you hurt me more than it hurt you.
Hopefully one day you'll see that teaching you right from wrong, the once in a while spankings, the ear tugs and time-outs were used in the hopes that one day that ALMOST-spoiled little brat would keep from becoming a self righteous, entitled adult whom lacks respect for authority.
I did it because I love you and it was the only way I knew how. And I HOPE that beyond all these things you know that to be fact more than any lesson I could teach you.
AMEN SISTER! well said. I'm so proud of the mother you are becoming. There is no 'perfect mom hand book' but I've always heard, "if you love your kids, you have to be hard on them." That is one thing that we have to remember w/the Lord in our lives, when we find ourselves asking "why am I going through this" it's God working in our lives to mold us to the wonderful being HE wants us to be. oxox
ReplyDeleteTATA, pledge the fifth amendment i did not do it even if you have pictures of a guy that looks like me purchasing plastic color BB guns , was not me.i Completely deny as benny do it.
ReplyDeletePS
Well done Lili i Love you with all my hart.